A Plea For Troubled Lovers (A.K.A. Sympathy for the Devil)

Posted on August 27, 2008. Filed under: Elsewhere in liberal politics. |

It is difficult to say this, but it’s easy to feel sorry for President Clinton and Hillary. He is being chastised now by all of his former disciples. What has happened for Bill to be in the doghouse? He probably thought that since he was supported through two terms where sex scandals were as regular items in newspapers as horoscopes that he had made lifetime friends with America. His followers helped him navigate away from sticky legal situations such as when about 300 FBI background files on many of his political rivals were found in a White House office. Heck, he was able to get away with that one without anyone really paying attention. Nobody seemed to mind about the illegal campaign contributions from the Far East. His eleventh-hour pardons came and went to no real fanfare on television or newspapers. Bill had to feel bulletproof as he was allowed to perjure himself while claiming, “I did not have sexual relations with that woman.” They even let him off the hook with the argument, “It all depends of what your meaning of the word is, is.” Not only did the media and public not mind, they thought it was “cute” to have a philandering president that lies about cheating on his wife as every other sleaze ball guy who cheats on his wife would lie. Everyone said it made him more real. They all said it doesn’t matter anyway, it’s only sex – even though Bill had established what had gone on under the Oval Office desk isn’t even considered to be sex. Bill was the nation’s leader who just loved too much, in fact he loved so much that sometimes he even got a little bit on someone. The mighty Bill has fallen and he’s fallen fast.

Hillary is probably feeling just as dejected. She had gotten used to getting help in covering for little “mistakes” such as odd futures transactions from which, she profited nicely. No one really got too concerned over the shady property deals she had taken part in down in Arkansas. In fact, the Clintons were made out as the victims of a ravenous partisan independent counsel, or as she called it, the Right-Wing-Attack-Machine.  This attack machine was even said to be causing Bill’s infidelity. No one even mentioned it was the independent counsel her husband, Bill had created.

She was even once allowed to claim she had been named after Sir Edmund Hillary, whose claim-to-fame was being the first to climb Mt. Everest. Nobody at ABC, NBC, CBS, The New York Times, or CNN stopped to remind her that Sir Hillary didn’t climb Everest until she was a few years old. It didn’t matter if what she said was technically correct, it was about Hillary. There was nothing that couldn’t be fixed before going live. She was coddled by a devout public as the poor woman that had to put up with America’s favorite lovable date rapist and his zany adventures. She had been hearing for the last eight years how Bush’s low approval ratings were her ticket back to the White House. She had probably started wondering if her old key would still work in the front door, and probably had ordered new presidential window treatments before the primaries even started. Her husband had probably even started interviewing new interns so he could hit the ground running.

Now Hillary can’t even claim to run from a helicopter in Bosnia under intense sniper fire without the networks pulling the footage showing otherwise. Every time Bill gets all red faced at the audacity of someone asking him about his chances to get bin Laden, the video runs on all of the evening news where they claim he is a liability to his wife’s campaign and the Democrats’ White House bid in general.

To Bill, it doesn’t seem that long ago that he lost his temper during a Fox News interview and all of his old friends at the main channels praised him for firing up the base before the elections. Now, he’s viewed like a bear at the zoo. People have to watch themselves around him or he’s liable to tear someone’s head off. In fact, he’s now being kept on a short leash at the convention. At one time he could pick up the phone to successfully order ABC to change a miniseries about the events leading up to the September 11 attacks in order to help preserve his legacy. Times must seem to change quickly for the former king of his party. It is true that those highest up fall the farthest and the fastest.

What changed though? Bill is still the slimy, perverted, pathological liar that he was during his first national campaign when America fell in love with him. Hillary is still the scariest gender-ambiguous politician to fill a pantsuit. Where did their adoring royal court go? How could they turn on the pair as quick and nasty as James Carville on one of Bill’s conquests that threatens to go public? The only explanation for the Clintons is that they chose to dance with the finicky political crowd. Democrats have always been able to leave an object of affection in the middle of the night with no note when they find their next heartthrob. It’s a process Bill should be familiar with.

None of that must be taking away the pain for Bill and Hillary of turning on the news to see Obama getting away with claiming his uncle liberated Auschwitz in World War II, when instead it was the Russian army that freed the concentration camp. A tear must fall from their eyes when Obama claims that the protests in Selma, Alabama inspired his parents to conceive him in an act of racial unity even though the events in Selma were a few years in the future at the time of Obama’s birth. Now, the same people that fawned over Bill and Hillary are now covering for Obama’s shady real estate deals and helping to sweep under the rug those little stories he tells to connect to voters that aren’t based on even remote truthfulness. The Clintons probably say every night when watching the news handle Obama, “We taught them that.”

So, keep this in mind when passing the Clintons on the street. They are doing all they can to put their lives back together. Who knows, they might even be talking to each other to try and figure out what went wrong.

Take every opportunity to let them know that it will all be back to normal. The Democrats and the media will only love Obama until the decision to pick him over Hillary blows up in their face. Their infatuation with Obama will be as short-lived as one of Bill’s trysts with the office help. Tell Hillary not to worry, in 2012 her royal court will return and all will be forgotten. Both her and Bill will be back to the same old dance they perfected over the years. That is, the dance where they commit their improprieties and their party and supporters only end up loving them more each time.

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    Is this really a new type of politician? Or is the Obama machine just using politics as usual in their campaign?

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